Between Two Promises Page 13
When did the privacy become a means to hide from truth? And was Aiden, like Daniel had once claimed while they had hiked the Swan Range, standing on a soapbox for the sake of his own ego? Was he trumpeting his principles merely because he could, in total disregard for others’ feelings?
An image of Elisabeth’s portrait of Daniel and Esther appeared in his mind. Esther was not a mere ghost. She had been a real person, Daniel’s wife, the mother of his child. They had lived as a couple on a simple Amish farm. Husband and wife. What had Elisabeth wanted to tell him by showing him her sketch? That she’d always known Daniel was gay, and that she was happy he’d found someone? Would she ever sketch Aiden and Daniel together like she had Daniel and Esther?
Perhaps he’d been selfish, trying to take Daniel away from a life he had known since his birth. Perhaps Daniel would be better off with a woman and children, living the life of a devout Amish farmer and furniture maker. Without the constant worries of being shunned by society.
Perhaps the greatest love he could bestow on Daniel was to set him free.
His cell phone vibrated inside his pants pocket (Daniel had made him turn off the ringer whenever around the Schrocks). Most likely Daniel checking on him, wondering where he’d stomped off to for a second time. He reached into his pocket and clicked off the phone, in no mood for curt text messages or angry voice mails.
The glow of clustered homes outside Henry drew him closer. He’d walk to town, maybe stop by The Henry Blade and chat again with his former boss. Maybe Kevin might want to grab some supper at the diner.
Happily, he saw Kevin’s office lights on. Kevin was alone, standing over the coffeemaker, when he stepped in.
“Where’s your new ace reporter?” Aiden asked, stomping his snowy boots on the door rug. “Off on assignment to uncover the great Christmas wreath heist?”
Both Aiden and Kevin laughed. “No, Carolyn’s at home. Told her to get some rest, she works longer hours than you used to. Come on in, Aiden. Some coffee?”
This time, Aiden accepted Kevin’s offer. His old boss seemed more sincere than the last time he’d offered Aiden coffee. Slipping off his gloves, Aiden took the mug from Kevin.
“I just turned off the Mr. Coffee, but it’s still hot,” Kevin said.
The warmth from the mug thawed him. He blew into the hot liquid, made himself more comfortable. “So, are you and Carolyn dating?” he asked.
“Dating?” Kevin’s eyes widened. “What makes you ask that, out of the blue?”
“Last time I was here you were near gushing over her.”
“Can’t a man appreciate an employee without there being any funny business going on?”
“Sure, sure you can, but I’m not stupid, Kevin. Last time I was here, you guys had hot and heavy written all over you.”
Kevin flushed but seemed to regain his confidence. “We’ve been dating for a few months.”
“I figured.” Aiden, worried Kevin might think he was mocking him, kept his tone earnest. He merely wanted to peel back the layers and get to some semblance of truth. Anywhere. Too many people hiding behind bushes. “I’m happy for you,” he said. “She seems like a real nice girl.”
“She’s very nice,” Kevin said, almost as if he would be shocked if anyone had disagreed. “Some may not see it so clearly at first, but I can assure you she’s a wonderful girl.”
“I guess you know about me and Daniel,” Aiden said. Nice to say it, flat out, without pretense. Since Kevin had already admitted his “dark secret,” Aiden figured he might as well also.
“No, what do you mean?” Kevin said, eyes wide.
“We’re a couple, just like you and Carolyn.”
“Really? You and Daniel Schrock? I never would’ve guessed.”
“I suppose people don’t pick up on those things as much as I assume they do,” Aiden said. “Or maybe they just don’t put much time in thinking about it.”
“The latter’s probably more the case,” Kevin said. “His family doesn’t know, do they?”
“No, of course not.” Determined to keep the frank channels open, Aiden went on. “But you probably suspected I was gay when I worked here?”
“Not at first,” Kevin said, looking away, red-faced. “I wasn’t sure. I figured it wasn’t any of my business.”
“Not too many gay people live in small towns, I guess, at least not openly.” Aiden sipped his coffee, relishing the warmth trickling down his throat.
“It would be difficult, I imagine. But apparently gay people crop up anywhere. Who would even guess about Daniel?” Kevin shook his head. “I never would’ve seen you two together back when you were living here in Henry. Pretty obvious you were friends, but not that close. How’re things going?”
“Have to admit, it’s been a little tough.” Aiden lowered his eyes to the floor. He had been repressing his emotions about Daniel for so long. Now, like a champagne bottle uncorked, he allowed his words to flow forth. “I guess I underestimated how much of a drastic change to his lifestyle us being together would be for him. Maybe I’ve expected too much.”
“He’s not resorting to drinking or anything like that, is he?” Kevin asked. “Some of those Amish, once they lose their community, they find another crutch, one that’s less healthy.”
Aiden snickered and shook his head. “No, I’ve never seen him drink alcohol. He’s surly at times, that’s all. The change has been hard for him. We kinda jumped into things. We moved in together awful quick. At first I thought we were going too fast. Now I wonder if we’re not going backward.”
“Has he officially left the church?” Kevin asked. “That could turn some heads around here. There’s that shunning business, you know.”
“Yeah, I know.” Aiden drew in his lips. The apprehensions from the walk over swamped his chest. Had he been wrong to take Daniel away from his family, his home, his world? Forcing the ominous Amish shunning upon him?
“He hasn’t declared he’s leaving the church, not yet,” Aiden said, trying to keep his tone encouraging. “He doesn’t talk much about it. Being Amish is part of his identity, his culture. Hard to give it up. I don’t blame him. I like the Amish lifestyle too.”
“It has its plusses, I imagine,” Kevin said. “I’m sure up in Montana you two live like the Amish, like frontiersmen.”
“Pretty rustic where we live, but sometimes I would like more. Or, should I say, less.”
“You always had romantic notions. That sometimes interfered with your reporting.” Kevin looked agitated, like he wished he hadn’t broached the subject of Aiden’s tenure reporting for him. He sat down at his desk, shuffled papers aside, switched off his computer, as if he wanted to shut down the office for the day.
Aiden ventured to say more. “I never told you about the threats I got while I worked here, did I?”
“Threats?” Kevin raised one eyebrow high above the top frame of his glasses.
“I was never sure who made them,” Aiden said. “I think it had to do with my investigation into Kyle Yoder’s death. Either that or someone didn’t like a gay man living in their small town. But I doubt that was the reason.”
“You never called the police?”
“I assumed best to let it go,” Aiden said. “I kinda worried if the police got involved they may damper my investigation. If anything, the threats only spurred me to investigate further.”
Silent a moment, Kevin gazed at the scattered papers and notepads on his desk. “You haven’t decided to start investigating again, have you? That isn’t what brought you back?”
Aiden snickered. “No, I really did come for Mark’s wedding. I’m not going undercover, if that’s what you’re thinking. But I’ve been considering reopening the investigation, to be honest.” He narrowed his eyes. “I’ve never believed Kyle committed suicide. But hey, you can’t stop me from looking into it. You’re no longer my boss.” Aiden chuckled.
“You know,” Kevin said, “I really did believe your theory about the Reverend Yoder killing Kyl
e.”
Kevin’s words sobered Aiden. He tightened his mouth and shook his head. “Then why did you want me to ever stop looking into it?”
Shifting his weight, Kevin said, “It was best to leave it alone.”
Aiden contemplated Kevin’s words. He’d always considered his former boss to be wise. He shrugged and said, “Either way, it’s behind me. Daniel convinced me to stop. I guess he and everyone else were right. I got in over my head.”
“Good,” Kevin said. “It’s best you do what Daniel says, especially if you want to keep the peace. You wouldn’t want to get any more of those threats now, would you, and cause any more worries for him? Awful spray painted messages scrawled across your door, pumpkins thrown at your window, nasty notes left in your mailbox. How much nonsense like that can a man take? Let it go. You have your whole life ahead of you to tackle unsolved mysteries.”
“You’re probably right.” Aiden looked toward the cottage cheese ceiling, mulling over Kevin’s sage advice. He understood Kevin wanted to leave. He set down his mug of coffee on a foldout table. “Did you want to grab some dinner?” he asked.
Kevin stood. “No, I can’t. Carolyn is expecting me. But thanks for asking. Maybe some other time.”
Aiden flinched from the sting of rejection. A familiar pain, lately. He forced a grin. “Well, I guess I better get back to the inn anyway. I have a hunch, after I wandered off again, Daniel’ll be pretty darn mad at me.”
Chapter Thirteen
THE doorknob jangled. Daniel stepped inside the room. His expression, stern and aggravated, did not surprise Aiden. Without speaking, Daniel stomped the snow from his boots and kicked them into a corner and went about yanking off his coat and gloves.
“Snowing again?” Aiden laid aside his paperback and glanced out the window above his bed. The darkness outside made discerning anything difficult. Daniel’s deliberate silence prevented him from saying more.
“What’s with you walking off without telling me?” Daniel said finally. “It’s the second time you done that. And you wouldn’t answer your phone? I was worried sick.”
“I guess I had it turned off.” Aiden reached over to the night table where his cell phone was charging and clicked it on. “There,” he said. “It’s on now. I forgot. Sorry.”
“What’s the point of having one of those contraptions if you keep it turned off?” Daniel went about undressing. “Everyone wanted to know where you went. You missed supper.”
“You sure anyone cared?”
“Of course, a person doesn’t vanish in the middle of sledding. Why did you leave without saying something?”
“I wasn’t feeling well.”
Daniel scrutinized Aiden as if trying to ascertain if he were telling the truth. “You coulda at least told me. I woulda taken you back to the inn.”
“I didn’t want to ruin everyone’s fun.”
“You didn’t even answer the room phone.”
“I was out for a while. I went into town for something to eat.”
Grunting and mumbling, Daniel strode into the bathroom. A few minutes later, he came out with his beard wet and his shirt off, probably left hanging over the towel rack the way he’d leave it back at the cabin.
“Are we going to check out and stay at the farm?” Aiden said. “Like Grace wanted?”
“David was probably right,” Daniel said. “Mom’s got enough on her hands without needing to worry over us.”
“I feel bad you’re not spending more time with your family. Maybe you can stay at the farm, and I’ll stay here.”
“I’m spending plenty time with them, and I don’t want you staying here alone.”
“I thought you’d like that idea,” Aiden said. “I’d be out of your way, no worries.”
“Don’t be shussly.” Daniel stripped off the rest of his clothes and, after slipping on his pajama bottoms, climbed into his bed. He gruffly pulled the bowtie quilt to his chin.
Leaning on his elbow toward Daniel, Aiden said, “I had a nice chat with Kevin today.”
“Is that where you been in town, tinkering around with Kevin Hassler again?”
“We had a lot of catching up to do. He’s about the only person around here who gives me the time of day. It’s nice to be open with someone for once.” Aiden didn’t know why, but he was in a mood to poke Daniel, to get a rise out of him. Daniel had come blasting into the room accusing him of being weak, and he wanted to show his strength.
“He knows we’re a couple,” he said.
Daniel’s eyebrows fused together. “How would Kevin Hassler know something like that?”
“I told him.”
“You did what? Why would you do that for?”
“Don’t worry, Daniel,” Aiden said when a shadow descended over Daniel’s face. “Kevin’s been around. He’s divorced twice and dating a girl half his age, that reporter who works for him.”
Daniel shook his head. “Not too smart, Aiden. I don’t want the whole county to know. He’ll probably tell that girl. No telling who she’ll tell.”
“I doubt they’ll make it into a banner headline in the Blade.” Aiden snickered.
“You know what I mean.”
“Is it so bad to be known to have a relationship with me, Daniel, even to an Englisher? I know things are different with the Amish, but you’ve been overreacting a lot lately.”
“What else you and Kevin been gabbing about? Does he know about me and Kyle?” Daniel looked almost exactly how Elisabeth had captured him in her portrait—sad, empty. Did Daniel feel the same way about their relationship as he had his and Esther’s when Elisabeth had sketched them? How would Daniel look if Elisabeth were to sketch him and Aiden as a couple? Would his expression excrete the same confusion, remoteness, resentment?
“I never told Kevin about that,” Aiden said, softening his tone. “I would never tell him about you and Kyle. I promised you I wouldn’t, didn’t I?”
“This is too risky, Aiden.”
Aiden shot him a glare. “Oh, you think I’m a risk now? Is that how you see me?”
“Keep your voice down. There’re people here yet.”
Aiden chuckled. “Do you ever hear yourself? You’ve become paranoid.”
“Paranoid? Don’t I have a reason to be? I been worried sick about—”
Daniel’s cell phone buzzed on the night table. He answered. His face went from twisted in irritation to limp with concern.
“What is it?” Aiden asked after Daniel clicked off the phone.
“That was Mark,” he said, staring toward where his feet poked under the bedcovers, the phone clamped in his large hand. “Leah’s real sick. She’s being rushed to the hospital in Decatur by ambulance.”
THE fluorescent lights in the waiting area cast an eerie hue over the family. No one spoke. Rachel wrung her hands where she sat, staring at her clogs. Samuel, beside her, his gray face drawn, gripped his knees. His grizzled beard dragged across his lap. Daniel, seated between Grace and Heidi, stared down the long hallway. Mark, so mature looking while he sipped coffee from a paper cup, was the only one standing. Not even seventy-two hours married and he already sported the beginnings of the prominent Amish beard. Aiden, away from the others, sat in a corner. Elisabeth, David, and Moriah had stayed behind at the house with baby Gretchen.
After receiving Mark’s phone call, Daniel and Aiden had rushed to the farm in the Suburban to pick up the family and drive them to Decatur. With everyone’s weary eyes fixed on the dark farmland rushing past, Samuel had explained to Daniel and Aiden what had happened.
Leah, right after they’d put her down for the night, had suddenly lost her breath. At first they assumed she was having difficulty swallowing, the way she often did, but this time the spasms worsened. They struggled with her battery-operated suction device to remove the mucus that often built up inside her nasal cavity. Nothing they did worked. She had lost the ability to speak long sentences and had almost no use of her arms to make hand signals to tell them what was wro
ng. Not until she was near blue in the face did they realize she lacked oxygen.
Mark said he’d nearly raced past the phone shack, his head was so full of Leah. After calling 911, he immediately dialed for Daniel. He was grateful Rachel had tacked Daniel’s new cell phone number on the shack’s wall.
Rachel had ridden with Leah in the ambulance. She seemed the most weary. She told everyone after they’d arrived Leah had gone into complete paralysis during the thirty-minute trip to the hospital. It was the only time Aiden recalled seeing Samuel show overt affection for his wife. He’d put his arm around her waist and gently escorted her to where they both now sat.
Daniel regretted not being with the family to help. He had said on the drive to the farm, his hands clasped onto the steering wheel like a vice, that it would’ve been his responsibility to make the 911 call and, as the eldest son, to calm everyone’s fears. Samuel, too old for such tasks, shouldn’t be expected to shoulder all the family’s burdens. Soon Mark would be moving on with his own life, living on his own farm. And David? Daniel had said he was unsure what to expect from David anymore.
Everyone knew the day was coming. Aiden guessed people never prepared for such moments. Having seen Samuel swing his engli, as he’d often called Leah, high into the air many times, Aiden suspected Samuel, though he’d never flaunt his sorrow, would likely miss her the most. Remembering how Leah would laugh whenever her father lifted her toward the ceiling, Aiden agreed she did look like a little angel about to spread her wings and fly away.
How strange to be at Decatur Memorial Hospital again. The last time he’d wandered its halls was after Daniel had been injured in a buggy accident last year, a few days before Thanksgiving. That was when Samuel had confronted him and asked him to leave Henry for good. Here he was with the family, one year later, as if none of that had ever happened.
Aiden focused his attention outside the window. His reflection stared back at him. Small raindrops dotted the darkened pane. Leaning in closer, he noticed the drizzle had changed over to freezing.